How To Make A Potion To Turn You Female

First add 250 billilitre of distilled water from the aquà pureè range. Make sure the water is as wet as possible.

Then add one whole jar of chessups, the anti-quarvine semi-chemical retrogelatine pipes.

Next you'll need one dried blood bar, this can be hard to find, but there's one eBay seller called Gavin who specialises in all forms of dried blood products.

The add a garrison tube of white tobe balls. It's very important that they are white, any other colour could cause ultra-cooling that can result in premature flatulence.

Then drop in a kresin tab of your choice, I'm using a chocolate flavoured one.

Finally add a teal tenderlech, just one good sized piece of this mysterious ocean fruit will be enough.

Then using your magic wand, knock three time on the side of the cauldron.

You'll know your potion is ready to drink when sparks appear from inside the cauldron. Wait for the to die down and then continue if you want.

Before drinking your potion, ensure no anchors have formed in the mixture. If they have, remove them before serving.

Using a scoopy-scooper transfer some of your potion into a chalice, add an ice cube and drink it through your mouth pipe. You'll start to feel a tingling sensation like reverse sick coming from within your bones. Don't fight this feeling and within seconds your transformation will occur.