The Ultimate List Of Unicorn Jokes, Puns & One-Liners

May 31, 2018 6:00 AM

The funniest and best jokes about the mythical creature unicorns, plus unicorn one-liners and the finest unicorn puns.

Unicorn
Q: What is the difference between Justin Bieber and a unicorn? 
A: One is a magical creature found in the dreams of little girls, and the other one is just a unicorn.

Q: What do unicorns eat for breakfast?
A: Lucky charms.

Q: What do you call a scary unicorn?
A: A nightmare.

Q: Whats the difference between an honest politician and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.
"Chuck Norris coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence."
Q: What do you call a unicorn with no horn?
A: A horse.

Q: Why did the unicorn cross the road?
A: Because it wanted to see its neighbours.

Q: What do you get if you cross a unicycle and a cob of corn?
A: You get a unicorn.

Q: Did you hear about the unicorn with a negative attitude?
A: She always said neigh.
Unicorn Meme

Q: What's the best type of story to tell a runaway unicorn?
A: A tale of whoa!

Q: What road do unicorns live on?
A: Mane street.

Q: What do you get if you cross a unicorn and a cow?
A: Horned beef

Q: What do you call a unicorn with large eyelashes? 
A: U-ni-brow.
"Unicorns are real they're just fat, grey, and called rhinos."
Q: What do you call a smart unicorn?
A: The "A" corn.

A unicorn walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer.
The landlord says "why the long face?"

Q: What did the unicorn tell the carrot?
A: U no corn.

Q: What do unicorns call their dads?
A: Pop corn.
Unicorn Meme

Q: What did one unicorn say to the other?
A: The pace is familiar but I can't remember the mane.

Q: What's the difference between a unicorn and a carrot?
A: One is a funny beast and the other is a bunny feast.

Q: Why didn't the unicorn want to join the army?
A: She didn't want to wear a uni-form.

Q: What do unicorns use for money?
A: Corn bread.
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