Most Haunted Jokes
Jokes about the cast and crew of the long-running, British ghost hunting show, Most Haunted, hosted by Yvette Fielding, including terrifying puns and howling one-liners.
Q: If the Beattie Sports channel covered the cricket, who'd be playing on the Most Haunted team?
A: Fred would bat, and Yvette fielding.
Q: How do the Most Haunted team keep fit?
A: By exorcising regularly.
Q: What kind of street does Fred Batt live on?
A: A dead end.
Q: Why won't Yvette Fielding eat at KFC?
A: Because of poultrygeists.
Q: Why didn't the ghosts want Most Haunted filming in their house?
A: It was their terror-tory.
Karl leaves the house with the Wason.
Yvette: "Are you taking the donkey for a walk?"
Karl: "You mean the dog?"
Yvette: "Shhh, I am talking to Watson!"
Q: Why do the Most Haunted crew hate rain?
A: Because it dampens their spirits.
Q: What's the best way to watch Most Haunted?
A: On a big scream TV.
Q: What happened when Watson ate too much garlic?
A: His bark was worse than his bite.
Q: Why does Fred Batt advice you always read the fine print?
A: Because the devil is in the details.
Q: Why are the buildings Most Haunted visit so tall?
A: Because they have hundreds of ghost stories.
Glen Hunt: "My friends say I'm skeptical, but I don't believe them."
Q: What does Yvette use in her hair before the show?
Q: Where do the Most Haunted team go after an investigation?
A: Anywhere that they can get boooooo-ze.
Q: Why did Yvette hear so many noises in the the graveyard?
A: Because of all the coffin.
Glen: I've worked out how the bike fell over at Eden Camp.
Glen: Because it was two-tired.
Q: What does Fred Batt serve to drink at Halloween parties?
Q: What's Yvette Fielding's favourite party game?
A: Hide and shriek.
Karl goes for a medical check-up, the doctor asks "do you do dangerous sports?"
"Well, sometimes I talk back at my wife."
Q: Why did Yvette and Karl phone the hotel reception during the witching hour?
A: To get broom service.
Q: How did Fred make the witch scratch herself?
A: He took away the 'w'.
Q: What's a lesson with Fred Batt called?
A: A demon-stration.
Q: Why did Stuart Torevell go outside at the Ancient Ram Inn?
A: To get some fresh hair.
Q: Where do Yvette and Karl go on holiday?
Whose a Fred of ghosts?
Q: How did Yvette open the door to the house she was investigating?
A: With a skeleton key.
Q: What does Fred Batt eat for breakfast?
A: Deviled eggs.
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